Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Kernelectomy


This little knucklehead went to the ER last night.  You'd THINK I'd have a big dramatic story from this.  Gushing blood, severed limbs, broken bones, SOMETHING.  Oh no.  I have a very expensive popcorn kernel.  Last night, for only the second and possibly the last time, we gave the boys some popcorn with their movie night.  Previously, I have not trusted Tate with the whole choking thing.  But, apparently, I failed to read the chapter in my parenting manual entitled "See Hole, Insert Small Object,"  because I wasn't prepared for his coming to me with his finger in his ear and saying "Mama. The popcorn makes my ear feel funny."  Hmmm.  Really?  Your EAR?  And, upon inspection, yup, the popcorn was definitely making his ear feel funny.  There it was, a nice, round, plump little kernel shoved nicely into his ear.  Right    down     into    his ear.  After some desperate attempts (and I say desperate because I DESPERATELY wanted to avoid the several hundred dollar emergency room visit) to remove the kernel ourselves (in various manners I will not divulge here as I do not want to be sued or reported to child services), we decided that we may, in fact, be making it worse and should, quite possibly, stop.  Tate seemed more than willing to go let a doctor take care of it.  Apparently, we cannot be trusted.  The lovely ER staff didn't have much better luck than us at first, but eventually flushed it out with a catheter and large amount of saline.  Tate was thrilled to get three stickers and a stuffed car, even after screaming bloody murder during the procedure.  And after our prayers, where we thanked God for the successful kernelectomy and that it wasn't something worse, we had a quick discussion involving small objects.  


Mama:  Tate, you know now to NEVER, EVER put something in your ear like that again, right? Will you ever put anything in your ear?

Tate:  NoooO


Hmmm.... perhaps I should have also mentioned his nose.....

4 comments:

beemahoney said...

OHHHH! I'm not the only one with freaky ER visits now! Most of the stuff that is shoved in the nose either gets blown out pretty quick, or after a lot of eye watering, comes out of the mouth in some way...that TATE!

Theresa said...

I did the popcorn in the nose, but mom got it out with tweezers - I think I was just uncoordinated, rather than inclined to experiment with new orifaces...

<---That Girl said...

kernelectomony - HA that cracked me up!! way to spend a fortune huh?

lsfinger said...

I have told this story several times today and have yet to tell it to someone without cracking up! I can only picture Mike as a young boy shoving the pom-pom up his nose! It's only right his son should do something similar! Maybe you should mention the nose as well!